We are the problem, BUT we are also THE SOLUTION!

(A short one today) Have you heard that before?  We are our own problem, yet we are our own solution?

Have you EVER hit Rock Bottom in your life?  Have you ever faced challenges so big, you often wondered what more you could handle?  Have you ever been placed in a situation where you wondered what the message you were supposed to be receiving was and why you were receiving it?

Often in life, as we go through and on continuation of our discussion of ego, we put out vibrations into the universe that do NOT serve our higher purpose.  These thoughts continue to bring us anguish, hurt and pain, tough situations and almost a paralysis.  See here is the bad news- We are our own problem- but the great news is, we are our own solution as well.  Let me explain.

We all exist in this world in a solid form and interact with each other, but what we tell ourseles, the story we feed ourselves is what "we" think and feel.  For you see, our lives and the situations we have in our lives will come about whether we have emotions or not.  For our emotions are simply a storyline we tell ourselves about our surroundings.  Thus creating vibration in the universe creating more of the same.  So the way to CREATE change in your life is to recognize this, and then CHANGE the vibration YOU want and desire.  For you see, what you WANT out of life, at our darkest hour, we need to step out of our own way, become humble and turn to our higher source and put it out there what we want.  For me, I always start my day with a prayer of gratitude followed by my "I AM" statements for the day.  Once I have said my I Am's for the day, I start my day and allow the thoughts to resonate with me for what I am and where I want to be rather than what may be actually going on in my life.  This creates a better path for me to exist in today.  I also understand the areas of life I want to change and what I want to get out of my life.  I send out the vibrations and get myself out of the way.  I allow my ego to shut down for a moment and allow myself to be at peace in the moment, live for the here and now and manifest that which I want out of my life.  It is extremely powerful when you start to understand that what is going on in your life, you are attracting to your life.

Here is how I became my own solution rather than my problem (I did need an external push to get this process started) :

Prayer of Gratitude:
I am thankful today for the abundance in my life, the wealth for which I have been provided, the relationships which continue to flourish and the gift of this beautiful life.  I am blessed to have all of my financial needs met as well as to be able to provide for those I care about the most.  I am grateful I have the opportunity to create change in someone's life today, for the ability, the skills and the knowledge to affect one person per day.  I am grateful for the ability to help in any way possible.  I am thankful I am generous and kind.  Thank you for all that has been provided for in my life and allowing me to give back in some small way.

I AM statements:

I AM
loyal
caring
loving
gentle
calm
peaceful
a great coach
an incredible father
admirable
strong
faithful
A great friend
willing to help
understanding
compassionate

and it goes on.

These two tools are the first step in creating a solution for our "Problems" and when you start to understand these two powerful tools, you are on the way to CREATING the LIFE YOU WANT!

Go out and Create today!

We were born Perfect- How to change your outlook on your inner child!

Today, I had the amazing experience of attending a session at New Thought Community in Fresno and what an amazing place. First of all, the topic I have chosen to write about today has a lot to do with the way we talk to ourselves and some of the stuff I have mentioned before in a lot of the topics I have covered.  Today, I had an opportunity to hear from a different perspective, a little bit about how we talk to ourselves including "Contention" and resolution.  It was a different twist on what I have been trying to communicate with you, so today, I want to speak in a different fashion with you and portray what it was that l got out of today's message.

The Ego-Less Faces

In order to understand some of what I am going to talk about today, I want to start with this.  We are all born PERFECT.  Yes, I said it.. we are ALL BORN PERFECT.  Some of our religious leaders want you to believe you are born imperfect, but in reality if we stop and we look at the virtues of what children represent, we realize we are all perfect in every way at the day of our birth.  I want you to think throughout this post about what it is that kids represent and what it is they have that we as adults don't have.  And See we are going to delve into a subject today that is going to challenge our very existence, the very thread of what we know, the very voice inside our head that questions us, guides us, and tells us we aren't good enough. 

Wait a second..did I just say we have a voice inside of our head that says we aren't good enough?  YES i did... and why did I say that?  Because we ALL DO!!! I don't care who we are, there is a voice inside of you, your ego, that creates pride, and creates situations in your mind that will challenge the very fiber of what you stand for and try to stop you in every direction that may either be good or bad for you.. It will put confusion and pain in front of you to help you navigate this strange thing we call life. 

OK.. so let's stop for a minute and identify what ego is... It is defined in the dictionary as: (Taken from www.thefreedictionary.com) 

1. the self of an individual person; the conscious subject

2. (Psychoanalysis) Psychoanal the conscious mind, based on perception of the environment from birth onwards: responsible for modifying the antisocial instincts of the id and itself modified by the conscience (superego)

3. one's image of oneself; morale to boost one's ego

4. egotism; conceit

So what this is saying is that our "ego" is a vision of ourselves, how we are "conscious" of ourselves, and what we think of ourselves.  This then becomes very telling for our discussion today.  We all have an ego right??? YES, we do... It matters not what you think, you have an ego.  Your ego becomes the inner voice that talks to you in every situation, every event, every moment in life.  It is a corrective and a lot of times harsh voice.  It is the one that can create self doubt but also the one that can create the most confidence within us.  It now comes down to training this "ego" to say the things you want it to say.  So here today, let's take an example.

Since I would say many of you whom read this blog are probably CrossFitters or at least in the fitness arena, I am going to start there.  Our ego, especially in the fitness arena is something that tells us we can do anything.. BUT when we screw up a rep and we get a "no Rep" especially in a situation of competition, it is the FIRST voice that tells us we can NOT do it as well.  In this way, our egos are so destructive to us.  Our ego has a mind of it's own if you will.  It knows how to be positive and negative, but prefers to beat the snot out of us when we make a mistake.  Typically because we want to be better.  In CrossFit as an example, during a workout, Coach yells at you that your range of motion isn't correct- you think to yourself darnit.. I have been trying so hard to get correct range of motion, why can't i get it, why did I mess up, why did that happen... i suck. I'll never get this workout done, I can't because I am too lazy, I am so tired....  blahdee blah blah...  (How do I know this happens... because it has happened to me several times before)  All of a sudden, the workout becomes a mental game in which you have to fight with your "Inner voice" to figure out how to complete the task at hand and figure out how to Accomplish the goal.  In fact, JUST today while I was working out, the workout was challenging me in a way I hadn't been challenged (since yesterday) and I wanted so much to throw in the towel after two rounds, and my ego... you can't do this, and my outside voice I said Come on.. you got this!  Trying to overcome the self doubt inside coming from that little voice trying to make me avoid the pain.



What if, and just what if, we were able to stop in our tracks when something happened and instead of when we made a mistake we dwelled on it for minutes, hours, days, possibly even months, we were able to become unattached to the emotions, forgive ourselves, learn from the mistake, never do it again and move on??  Aren't we now talking about the innocence of a child, the passion they have for life.. an un-knowing of what might be societally unacceptable?   You see, it is the stigmas, the challenges and the values brought forth by yes, our parents, that help us to become the adults that we are.  The up-side is, that most of us turn out ok.  But that doesn't change the fact that we get in the way of ourselves more often than not.  We are fearful, our own worst critic and more often we jump on ourselves faster than anyone else ever could.  What this means is that our point of contention when we make a mistake can become an internal battle in which we struggle and maybe never recover from.  The challenge is how to we reduce our time of contention and enter into resolution quickly??

This has to do with training our mind how to speak to ourselves.  We have to realize first that we are human.  According to Alan today, he uses three steps- Forgive, Thanking, Loving.  In my world when I make a mistake, what I do is reflect, commit to change and continue.  Both are very similar in philosophy, just a difference in how we go about it.  The whole goal is to minimize the reflection time until later.  or in the case of forgive, to forgive as quickly as possible.  We have to be able to stop ourselves in our tracks and forgive ourselves for making a mistake and not getting where we want to right away.  You have to realize, forgiving ourselves for maybe not performing as well as we want at a competition or even in life, is ok.. did we give it our best shot?  did we give everything we had to the moment, because truly all we have is this moment..  Were we doing everything we could to get the best out of the situation rather than putting in less than full effort.  So what happens, is we talk to ourselves and fill our head with lies about ourselves.. tell ourselves we will never accomplish what we want.. and so it becomes our reality.  This is when you absolutely have to reverse that talk and say you CAN do whatever it is Rather than you can't!

This brings me to the topic of your inner child.  I know this is all very brief.  It is hard to touch on so many things while typing away and to keep you interested... yes.. I saw that yawn!

If you think about it for a moment, we all want to be children again, to enjoy and know joy like no other, to never know and understand what it means to react, but just to be able to Create within our tiny little minds what it is we want out of life.  When was the last time you just used your imagination to imagine you were a fighter pilot, or a princess, or a robot, or the president?  When was the last time that you did something that you didn't beat yourself up over it?  This is the essence of your inner child saying.. let me out.. I don't want to be judged, but have so much fun that it hurts.  I want to have fun because I was born perfect and along the way I learned challenges and fear and obstacles.  Somewhere along the way I heard that I wasn't good enough, or that I wasn't loved, or that I was never going to be a rock star.  And it shattered my dreams.. I just want to go back to the days when I never knew the impossibilities of life, but only the possibilities.  When I could make a wagon fly, or I could make my hand into many different animals and laugh and giggle and just enjoy how life happens.

How amazing would your life if for just one day, you let yourself be a kid again?  Remember we have kids for a reason.. to remember who we were when we had fun.. and to remind us of what life could be like if we just let go and became unattached and had fun!

Describe for us in the comments an experience you had in which you felt you stifled your inner child and what did you do to overcome that?

more to come!

Getting out of your comfort zone. A quick one!

Every so often in life, we find ourselves in situations, challenges and events that may either keep us in our comfort zone, or if they require us to step out of our comfort zone, we won't end up doing them because it is challenging, scary, or even can be "hurtful".  Today I truly want to spend some time writing about these times in which our comfort zone becomes a limiting factor in us exploring all of the possibilities in our lives, and prevents us from moving forward.

Definitely out of MY comfort zone, but being in a tight spot is for most of us!

There is a great quote by Teddy Roosevelt that says:

"It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doers of deeds could have done them better.  The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by the dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly... Who knows great enthusiasm,s, the great devotions, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at his worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory or defeat"

This quote always speaks volumes to me when I am looking at a project or event in my life that I look at and say it is overwhelming, or it is a scary place to be, or I have fear, or it just seems daunting.  I would rather step into a role of giving my all to every attempt rather than sit back and watch life go by.  But this requires leaving the zone of comfort and ensuring that the things that we are doing are in accordance with our dreams, goals and being true to ourselves without fear.  Remember we have talked about fear, and what it does to us.

Fear keeps us in our comfort zone.  It is one of those things that comes into us in every situation.  I own a CrossFit gym and have recently been working with people whom have been filled with nothing but self-doubt and fear.  When I look at them with confidence and demonstrate to them they have it in them to complete an exercise or a workout, the fear starts to subside, but they always look at me as if it will be the worst experience in the world.  It is their self talk that is putting the fear or doubt in them.  This is when it is MOST important to break out of your comfort zine, to push through, to burn a little, to drive a little harder, to dream a little more, to get out of your head, to get into the mindset of I can rather than I can't, to put aside the doubts we have of ourselves and start believing in ourselves more than we ever have!  It is times like this such as at a CrossFit workout when you have to put aside what you think you know of yourself and stop existing in that comfort zone and BLOW THROUGH THE DOORS in a way in which power has never been exerted before!!!

Now think for a second if we approached life in the same way, what would you accomplish and what would you do?  What are some of the things that when you look at them, they keep you in the comfort zone?  What are some of the things you would do if you didn't know fear.  What are some of the things you could accomplish if only you could get out of that comfort zone.  What are the things that keep you "Comfortable" rather than pushing for what you want and deserve in life?  We all deserve so much out of life, but we allow ourselves to stay "Comfortable" because it is easier.  Is that what your burning desire is, to just exist and be comfortable, to be lead Rather than to lead, to continuously allow others to think for you and believe everything that is put in front of you, or do you want to question it, come up with your own ideas and challenge others to change the way they think, do you want to be one of the herd or do you want to turn and walk the other direction because you know that's what will serve your higher purpose?  It's all up to you.  If you want to progress anywhere in life, you have to grow and growth comes from stepping out of your comfort zone and taking your toe and dipping it in the water.  It all starts with ONE step, one toe, one moment, one action, one thought, one event.  The question is how long will you wait until you are ready, and allow yourself the challenge of getting out of the comfort zone??

Attitude- What role does it play in our lives?

Have you heard this before:

"Attitude not aptitude determines your altitude in life"

I just recently began reading "The Difference Maker" by John Maxwell again.  And It reminded me of the number one thing in our lives that will help us to determine how we can react or how our ability to respond to any given situation directs us towards our programmed response- Our attitude.

How many times have you woken up and felt like you "woke up on the wrong side of the bed".  Well have you ever noticed how that thought process shapes the rest of your day, what you tell yourself throughout the day and how your ability to respond to each and every situation changes?  How many times have you stopped yourself when you are having one of those days and "changed your attitude"?

I once heard in a management seminar the following-
If your job sucks, and your car sucks, and your spouse sucks and your cat sucks, and your house sucks- then you suck.  What does this mean????  Really?

As I was reading through Conversations with God today, a quote that stuck out to me was:
"It begins with you.  Everything.  All things.  You want the world to change, change things in your own world" (page 240)

This right here is the heart of everything we have been talking about over the last few posts- and it really can come down to attitude and how we look at our own world.

Have you ever noticed, there are people in our lives that seem to be eternal optimists?  Have you ever thought that maybe they look at life in a different light than others, not really focussing on seeing the negativity, not allowing the group consciousness of our society and the challenges we may all face as a human race affect them in such a way it brings them down?  How do you think it is they stay in the positive happy optimistic world they exist in with all of this turmoil, challenge and plight in the world.
It is simply their attitude.

Our attitude, whether you think it or not, is brought on by some of the very things we have discussed in this blog already- how we talk to ourselves, our beliefs we tell ourselves, and the ability to respond to the opportunities presented to us.  Wait0 did I just say to the opportunities presented to us?  YES.
Every event and experience we have is an opportunity for us to respond, an opportunity for us to have an "attitude adjustment", an ability to respond in any way we see fit.  

picture courtesy of: http://www.altdaily.com/features/news/opinion-news/a-new-transpo-option-part-one.html

Let me give you an example of an attitude adjustment/opportunity for growth and the ability to respond.  For those of you whom live in congested areas where there is a lot of traffic (for I don't... the most traffic i deal with is... well.. there is none although when I travel, i experience it)  it can take its toll on your mindset, agreed?  I would say that people react in a few different ways- I know when I am in a place of the challenged attitude , traffic to me is the worst thing in the world.. it stops my forward progress and makes me impatient, and frustrated.  What would happen if when I am in the challenged attitude that is what it is, we look at it as part of life, something we can't control and just take a deep breath and settle in for the "ride" if you will.  Doesn't it make sense that our attitude adjustment in that experience would then allow us to look at it differently?  and we would be in a much different altitude if you will? What if we went to this place instead in our mind:

What would your reaction and attitude be if you thought differently.  You see what happens is when we put our challenged attitude out into our thoughts, our thoughts create vibrations within the universe that respond with more of the same that we are putting out there.  You see, our attitude is EVERYTHING we exist in, it determines how we travel through life, it determines where we go and how the mechanics are laid out in front of us.  I can speak from personal experience in so many instances that when I have had a less than positive attitude that things in my life seem to continue to go the wrong direction, but when I start to look at the glass as half full again and determine that it has been a focus on the less than positive attitude I normally carry in life that is bringing with it a challenge for me, that life seems to play itself out in a most positive fashion.

So what is it about these people that makes them so "Optimistic".  It simply put, is the way they CHOOSE to look at the world.  Our attitude is a choice we make every day.  It is the way we choose to live, choose to believe, choose to think. It is trainable.  For those of you whom have what we would call a less than positive attitude, all it takes is to start with ONE positive thought or action per day.. and then it becomes two, then it becomes three... and so on.   Pretty soon, you will see that the world isn't such a bad place after all.  It is only then, that if each and every one of us does this, we will affect change in the world and change the attitude of the human race.  It starts inside each one of us and creates everything!

I will continue with this topic another day, but for now- realize that attitude is everything.  Start to look at what your attitude affects throughout your day.  What things do you notice that your attitude is affecting in your day?